Johan de Kleine
Marlies Mennega
Samenwerkingspartners
If One Is Truly to Succeed in Leading
a Person to a Specific Place,
One Must First and Foremost
Take Care to Find Him Where He is
and Begin There.
This is the secret in the entire art of helping.
Anyone who cannot do this
is himself under a delusion
if he thinks he is able to help someone else.
In order truly to help someone else,
I must understand more than he
–but certainly first and foremost
understand what he understands.
If I do not do that,
then my greater understanding
does not help him at all.
If I nevertheless want to assert
my greater understanding,
then it is because I am vain or proud,
then basically instead of benefiting him
I really want to be admired by him.
But all true helping begins with a humbling.
The helper must first humble himself under the person
he wants to help and thereby
understand that to help is not to dominate but to serve,
that to help is a not to be the most dominating
but the most patient,
that to help is a willingness for the time being
to put up with being in the wrong and
not understanding what the other understands.
(Sören Kierkegaard)






